Parenting a teenager? Feeling like you’re on a rollercoaster?
The hormone-induced emotional swings coupled with the intensly tragic way teens tend to look at life’s ups and downs can create a pretty volatile environment.
Simply put, teenagers are moody. I think we can all agree on that.
Who better to help you navigate the stormy emotional seas than a licensed family therapist whose maiden name is Mood? Seriously.
Have a seat on my proverbial sofa. Let’s talk.
I'm a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist (MFC # 45366) in California. I currently serve as Head of Clinical Services for a large non-profit, and I've worked with families, teens, parents, & kids for over 10 years. I received my master's in Psychology and Counseling from New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary.
You name it, I've worked there: a crisis pregnancy center, psychiatric hospital, drug rehabilitation, several non-profits and homeless shelters, a foster family agency, and in private practice. The location doesn't matter to me, just my purpose. I desire to help others navigate their emotions and manage their behaviors to live a fuller, more joyous life.
When I'm not counseling or spending time with my husband and little girl, I'm blogging at my site The Character Therapist, an online therapy service for fictional characters. I love what I do so much, I crossed over to diagnosing make-believe people. Just don't tell my clients, or they'll think I'm the one who needs therapy!“Resentment is like taking poison and hoping the other person dies.”
– St. Augustine
~by Jeannie Campbell, LMFT
The Lord made us emotional beings, but in so doing, he didn’t screen certain emotions from our range of experience. Would that he had, right? Most people don’t exactly thank God for giving us jealousy.
But could it be that jealousy has gotten a bad rap?
It seems that jealousy in adolescents is on the rise. A recent study in the journal Developmental Psychology found that intimate friendships in teens are a double-edged sword. On one hand, they foster support, security and a sense of belonging and similarity. On the other, they cultivate feelings of vulnerability, which result in jealousy of and even aggression toward the very people with which our teens are close.
It’s counterintuitive, given that most jealous reactions stem from the perceived threat that the teen is going to lose something or someone. But jealousy can often become destructive, destroying the very connections our children cherish.
And for an interesting aside: girls are more jealous than guys. Girls seem to have a higher standard for loyalty, kindness, empathy and commitment than boys, so they get more jealous when those standards aren’t met.… continue reading
Teens sometimes get a bad wrap due to the hormonal surges that bring emotional ups and downs. The truth is that most teens navigate the duress and stress of being a teen fairly well with the help of supportive parents and a good peer support network.
But sometimes, more serious emotional problems will persist. Depression is treatable, but experts say only 1 in 5 depressed teens actually receive professional help. As parents, it’s good to know some of the warning signs of depression so that you can best direct and guide your child to get help.
Identity Stage
Teenagers are working through the Identity Stage in psychosocial development. With this stage comes puberty, sexual exploration and discovery, and trying to figure out where and how they fit in. Parental conflict is almost assured as teens start to spread their wings, and this can add to the perfect storm brewing in adolescence.
A depressed teen might not appear all that sad or withdrawn. In fact, in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, experts make a clear distinction that anyone under 18 might be more likely to exhibit irritability, aggression, or even rage. You’ll feel it in your bones when the behavior is more than average teenage “moodiness.”
Of course, your child might be more of a “textbook” definition of depression: sad or melancholy, tearful, withdrawn, restless, or agitated.… continue reading
If I could pinpoint one thing that gets teens more riled up in my office than anything else, it would be privacy. They want to be behind closed doors, have a personal cell phone call to themselves, and not have their parents checking up on their internet usage.
But how much privacy should a teen get?
The argument that they are still under your care is valid, but that care can and should change the older your child gets. As an infant, there aren’t boundaries between parent and child, but I bet most of us remember the first time our toddler didn’t want to hold our hand to cross the street because she was a “big girl” now.
Healthy boundaries are important. Every child kicks against them, but every child needs to know where the lines are drawn.
Here’s a good rule of thumb: The amount of responsibility and maturity your teen displays should directly correlate with the amount of privacy afforded them.
If you’ve got a teen who is honest, hangs out with who he says he’s going to be with, comes home on time, then you have no reason to be suspicious. Tell him that you trust him because he is behaving so well, that way his privacy becomes a reward instead of a right.… continue reading
This is a test post. The first post in this column will go live on March 2nd and will post the first Friday of each month.… continue reading
It’s that time of year when parents thoughts turn toward where their kids should go to school in the fall. For some, their thoughts will turn to homeschooling. How can you evaluate whether homeschooling might be right for your family? I have often heard my mom tell people that homeschooling… [read more]
“Where Are You With Guys Right Now?” That may seem like a lame question to ask a bunch of teenage girls, but there are actually as many answers as there are girls themselves. Contrary to what it looks like in every teen-focused magazine you see at the grocery store, not everybody is havin… [read more]
Loyalty is an important part of relationships with friends and family. What does loyalty mean and how far show it go? Does it require that you support people even when they’re doing something wrong and/or dangerous, or does loyalty actually require you to stand against those things for you… [read more]
Slider by webdesign
