by Nancy Rue
Part 1: Is Everybody Doing It? Really?
Since this is not my first rodeo in talking about the issue of sex and teens, I know what the possible reactions are to that title:
“I’m sick of hearing about it.”
“I already know I’m not having sex until I get married so why even talk about it?”
“I’m not seeing anybody wanting my body any time in the next . .well, ever . . . . so”
Or, depending on how old you are, just plain:
So let me just reassure you that we aren’t going to be talking about the details, or even whether having sex when you’re not married is the right path to take. We got that part, right?
Where we’re going is into the heads of guys and what their reactions are to the question: “Do they really only want one thing? Is everybody really doing it?”
Here’s what I got from some teenage boys when I was writing The Whole Guy Thing:
“There are guys who do only want sex, but not all of us. Some guys want sex and a relationship. Some guys want to wait until marriage.”
“No respectable guy just wants sex. We do want relationships.
“No way guys only want sex from a girl! Girls are more than that. They’re a companion. They’re someone to just hang out with.”
“There are times when my mind goes out in temptation land, but not every time I see a girl or am with one. Sex is not always the thing that pops into my mind.”
Not all of those guys are Christians. In fact, they represent the 87% of teens fifteen and under who have reported in studies that they aren’t engaging in sexual activity. That means only 13% actually are – according to them.… continue reading